Single motherhood and genealogy: still stigmatizing?

This is the cover of a book my mother wrote in tribute to her mother. Dedicated to single motherhood, as both my mother and grandmother raised their children as unmarried women. The book was published ten years ago. I will always be super proud that my mother shared her story with readers across the world! From Cape Verde to Portugal and from Luxembourg all the way to Argentina!

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Single motherhood and its genealogical consequences are a very important topic. Not only when looking back at your own recent family history within the last 3 or 4 generations. But actually also when wanting to trace back further in time. Especially relevant for Afro-descended populations I would say. However in this blog post I am going to keep it short & sweet. Because my main intention is to wish my mother a Happy Mother’s Day 😀 Amor É Só de Mae!

I will focus mostly on my own personal background. Although again really I do think this is something which merits a much more elaborate approach. I am very curious to know if there have ever been any in-depth studies about this subject. If you have any suggestions, please let me know. Also feel free to share your own perspective/experiences in the comment section! 

Perhaps as a sign of the times genealogy is becoming ever more popular. However for some people researching their family history and deeper “roots” is more challenging than for others. Especially due to lacking or incomplete paper trails. Relying mostly on DNA testing instead. Which can be very helpful. But at times also quite shocking when revealing unknown family ties. Most notoriously when a non-paternity event is involved!

To answer the blogpost’s question: I feel immense pride and never-ending gratitude for having been raised by a strong single mother! In fact I hail from a long unbroken line of unmarried maternal ancestors, going back to at least my great-great-grandmother. But probably also beyond. I am aware of the social stigma which traditionally comes with having been born out of wedlock. But honestly this has never really bothered me in my personal life.

I understand that things might not be the same for everyone. But looking back, growing up in a single-parent household has been bliss (for the most part 😉 ). And in my adulthood I find it truly enriching to realize how much sacrifice my mother and my maternal ancestors before her had to endure in order to see their children survive & thrive. In fact my Cape Verdean grandmother not only raised her own 4 children but also 5 grand-children and 1 great-grandson!

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Contents of this blog post:

1. Fonte Felipe is just my nickname.
2. Maternal lineage or paternal lineage: which matters most? 

1) Fonte Felipe is just my nickname

Picture of my mother in front of my grandmother’s house in Fonte Felipe. She was born there but grew up with my great-grandmother in the countryside during her early childhood.

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Some people might already know but Fonte Felipe is not my real name. I just use it for blogging! Fonte Felipe is the name of a neighbourhood in the city of Mindelo, which is located on the Cape Verdean island of São Vicente. The famous Cape Verdean singer Cesaria Evora actually has a song about it. Because she is also from Mindelo (see this Youtube video). So in a way it is a playful reference to my direct roots 😉

However because of circumstance my mother was partially raised by her grandmother (my great-grandmother) when she was still young. This was outside of town in a rural place of São Vicente near Tope de Caixa. And probably for my mother this place holds equal or even greater significance than Fonte Felipe. The landscape and whole vibe over there is resembling the rural and mountaineous island of Santo Antão. And in fact Santo Antão is where all my Cape Verdean family originally comes from, when tracing back to my great-grandparents.

This is also beautifully described in my mother’s book: Bia, Minha Mae. A tribute to her mother, who was known as Bia. Although my grandmother’s real name was Maria Beatriz. For Cape Verdean standards this is a rather short name. This is because my grandmother was not given the full surnames of her parents. Her birth father was not married with her mother (my great-grandmother). And actually this also goes for my great-grandmother! 

Single motherhood in itself is quite common in Cape Verde. It is known that during colonial times family structure was greatly disrupted. Not only because of slavery but also afterwards. Marriage was of course promoted by the Church and “civil society”. However poverty, recurring droughts but also widespread machismo did often lead to unmarried women having to take care of their children being born out of wedlock.

I can only imagine all the struggles my maternal ancestors must have gone through. Actually my mother’s father as well as the father of my grandmother did play a meaningful role in their lifes. But I stand in awe for all the accomplishments of my mother, grandmother and great-grandmother! My mother had a very hard time when she first migrated to the Netherlands. But eventually she managed to not only succesfully raise her own two children. But she was also always busy helping out family members left behind in Cape Verde. Later on starting her own charity foundation and becoming a well known author among Cape Verdeans as well.¹ 

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2) Matrilineal or patrilineal: which matters most? 

***(click to enlarge)

Source: Concepts – Paternal vs Patrilineal and Maternal vs Matrilineal (DNAeXplained)

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I am aware that this might be seen as a contentious question to raise. Afterall the Bible says you should honour both your parents! I don’t mean to distract from this basic principle. However for various reasons the balance of how each person values his parents might vary considerably. And this could also impact your interest in their genealogy. 

As mentioned already my real name is not Fonte Felipe. My name is Peter and I was named after my Dutch grandfather, as used to be the custom. However otherwise my birth father has not played any role in my upbringing. And in fact I also do not carry his surname. Obviously this greatly impacts my perspective. To be sure: I do not harbour any ill will towards my paternal side! But I am just not that interested in exploring that side of my ancestry. Although actually I do find my paternal haplogroup (I1*) very intriguing.² 

This should not be that surprising in itself. Afterall most people tend to have their particular “favourite” family lines they wish to explore further. I was reminded of this recently when watching a Dutch TV show looking into the family history of a Dutch-Cape Verdean comedian called Edson da Graça. It turned out that both his parents were born out of wedlock. But especially on his father’s side he felt the stigma of not inheriting his paternal surname. A sense of rejection was combined with unresolved feelings of social class discrimination.³ 

His father’s father was a relatively rich man. Married but also having several children with other women. Not uncommon for Cape Verde.. These children were given financial support and also acknowledged to some extent but not given his name. Also his various households were kept strictly apart. His children with different mothers being forbidden to talk to each other even when they knew they were half-siblings! 

This family story is not exactly the same as my mother’s but I am still seeing a few similarities. Also because this Dutch-Cape Verdean comedian is actually from the same island as my mother. And his grandfather is from the same place in Santo Antão as my grandfather (Garça). So he is bound to be related to me in some way 😀

However I find it funny that for me personally I could care less about my paternal surname. And this also goes for my mother. Instead I am greatly intrigued by the surname of my earliest direct maternal ancestor: Francisca Ana Verissimo. She was the grandmother of my great-grandmother. Regretabbly this surname was not passed on to my great-grandmother. However my mother and I might rectify this one day by adding it to our existing surnames! 

I do not have any hard data at hand but I greatly suspect this issue of single motherhood resonates not only for many Cape Verdeans but also more widely in the Afro-Diaspora. I find this a very fascinating subject. But for now I will just list some of my immediate thoughts. Again feel free to share your own perspective/experiences in the comment section! 

• Not knowing the paternal side of your family creates extra obstacles or even brick walls in your genealogy research

• Also going back further in time you might often have more certainty about the maternal lines than the paternal ones

• Paternal surnames are traditionally seen as more “prestigious” but this often reflects male-orientated power structures (patriarchy, colonialism). 

• Several African societies have however traditionally been matrilineal, incl. the Bijagos from Guiné Bissau!

• Maternal haplogroups are more likely to be African than paternal haplogroups for most Afro-descended populations.

• I do not believe my maternal haplogroup is exclusive to any ethnic group or can be used to confirm an ethnic background. This is sadly still a very common misconception. However given the importance of my direct maternal line it does greatly resonate with me that my maternal haplogroup happens to be L3e4!

• Genetically of course we inherit in equal part from our parents. But what about cultural transfer and identity? Again personal circumstances might vary. But generally speaking I would venture to say that a mother’s bond with her child is unmatched. And this will also reflect in upbringing and cultural retention. 

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This picture was taken in Buenos Aires/Argentina during the presentation of my mother’s book about my grandmother Bia. My brother and I were there as well. An amazing saga I will never forget and still fills me with enormous pride! The presentation was done in a club house for Cape Verdean-Argentines. With an introduction by Miriam Gomes, a well known professor and activist for Afro-Argentines. My mother was determined to also have this book presented in Argentina! Because Argentina has always been very special for my grandmother. She was intending to migrate there around the ending of WWII, to follow the man she loved. At that time many Cape Verdeans had already settled there to improve their lives, after suffering from droughts etc.. However eventually my grandmother decided to say put in Cape Verde. Because she was the only surviving child of my great-grandmother and she didn’t want to leave her alone.

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Notes

1) The first book my mother wrote was Saudades do Dany. Followed by Adeus Meu Amor, republished as Um Dia Saberás O Quanto Te Amo. Ten years ago she wrote Bia, A Minha Mae. And currently she’s writing her new book. Aside from selling her books in Cape Verde my mother has promoted her work across the Cape Verdean Diaspora. Touring the Cape Verdean migrant communities across Europe (Netherlands, Luxembourg, France, Portugal and Italy), the USA and even Argentina!

2) Because of my family history I have always been somewhat sceptical of the deeper meaning of surnames. However I find it quite ironic that if I indeed had been given my father’s surname I would basically be known as Peter The Great 😀 No doubt someone with a formidable record and even an historical link with the Netherlands. But not someone I would want to be associated with…Hopefully both Russia and Ukraine will soon be redeemed from his imperialist legacy, once and for all!

3) This TV show is basically the Dutch version of Finding Your Roots by Dr. Henry Louis Gates, Jr.  See link below if you want to watch it. Regrettably no English subtitles. But greatly recommended for those who understand Dutch, Crioulo and also Portuguese!

• Edson da Graça – Verborgen Verleden!

Aside from the engaging content it also features very nice footage of São Vicente and Santo Antão! Also at the end his DNA results (Ancestry) are being shown. Overall well done, but I found it very misleading to claim that Cape Verdean genealogy is a lost cause after 3 or 4 generations… It is mentioned that records are incomplete and have been crumbling. To some extent this is true but..apparently the makers of the show were not very well acquainted with these sources..

• Cape Verde DNA, Inc (Facebook: the biggest online community of Cape Verdean Genealogy & DNA enthusiasts!)
• Barros & Brito Online Family Tree (searchable and very extensive!)
• Cape Verde, Catholic Church Records, 1787-1957 (FamilySearch)
• Cape Verdean Genealogical Resources (by James J. Lopes)
• Cape Verdean Historical Resources (Cabo Verde Raizes na Africa)
• Cape Verde History Unearthed (blog by one of my closest DNA cousins)
• Genealogia da Familia Barbosa (by way of Web Archive)
• Historical visits to the Cape Verde Islands + Chronology (Heuijerjans.net)
• The Creola Genealogist (blog)